I mean... oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rude.
No, you probably do not know me, and yes, of course you are you.... that goes without saying.
But.... are you sure that you don't know me?
I certainly remember you. I wasn't sure at first, but its coming back to me.
My goodness. Has it ever been a long time. What? About a hundred and thirty years? We were captured in Africa and stuffed into a slaver's hold. No? Well you wouldn't remember much would you? You caught a bad fever after about two weeks. Really rank and filthy in there. Some 37 others died but you hung on. After they sighted land and we thought you might pull through. When they pulled us out of the hold, they wouldn't spare the medicines or clean linens that might have saved you. Killed you on the spot with a fid instead. I guess I won't mention how since you don't remember anyway. Rotten shame. I could have used your help on that plantation too, none of the others really knew me, not like you.
Well, how about when we were in China then? We were slaves then too. Oh come on, you must remember! Being peasants was close enough to being slaves: they took most of our harvest. The Mongols conquered China, but they treated us the same. We were just farmers so we really didn't much care who took our produce. The Mongols were a lot less forgiving though. We weren't allowed to possess weapons or anything. Wouldn't matter if we did, they were the best at everything. Whoops, they killed you didn't they? That's right. Well I told you not to hide those missionaries! They had outlawed Christianity too!
Well, you never did know what was good for you. You thought being gladiators would be fun. You idiot! We never, ever, had it so good as we did in the bath houses. As long as everyone had their wine they could care less what we did! Were you happy? No! Had to have your freedom. I'll be damned. I just realized. It was those Christians that time too, wasn't it? I can't believe I let you talk me into gladiator school. Why couldn't have just run away while everyone was drunk? They would never have remembered what we even looked like! Well you sure got yours for that bright idea, didn't you? You dodged that trident fine.... and got caught in the spokes of the chariot wheel. The crowd loved that. That guy had it easy from then on. He just had to drive around the ring and run you over anything that even looked sharp. I think the Emperor was going to spare you if you survived, but that about when I was run through. That crowd. Wow. That guy in the Charon getup said it was the loudest cheering he'd ever heard in the Coliseum - before he skewered me.
II.
Yes, I remember... but I remember differently.
You assured the slavers that I was alive, but you ate my share of the food - I wasn't that delirious!
Yes, I hid the missionaries from the Mongols. Until you sold us all out! I was your wife, you bastard!
We had it good in the baths? How dare you say that? You must have been just as drunk as the Romans! I was your son! I must have been a particularly beautiful youth as well; damn near every one of them paid you in gold coin to sodomize me! I repeatedly begged for you to make it stop, but your heart must have turned to gold. My only way out was to assault those bastards and get sent to the arena! Winning in the arena would make me free, even from you! I was about to kill that Netter too, but you pushed me under the chariot hoping they would be lenient with you!
Arrgh! There!
Since I've just punctured your aorta and lung you have about 5 minutes remaining for this incarnation. Just like the masters taught me - they would be so proud. Don't look at me like that, you had this coming for a long time, and I refuse to suffer from your toady ways during this lifetime. Be silent for the first time in eons.
Next time we meet, try to show a little compassion, maybe even some backbone.